The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I am available for nakedness
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
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