I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
He said the last thing he remembered thinking was: 'Why is this vagina spinning?' Too drunk sex is no ones friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize