sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Randomize
