Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
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