3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
