S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Randomize
