I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
