i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
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