Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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