does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
