My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
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