Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
