Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
