so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
