your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I think your dad took our porno
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize
