one two three fourrrrnication!
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
Randomize
