i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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