Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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