Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Randomize
