youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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