I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Who died my cat blue again?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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