So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
