You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
