Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
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