We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
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Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
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I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize