i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
