bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Randomize
