i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
