He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
Randomize
