If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center