hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Randomize
