I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Randomize
