His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
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