id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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