I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Randomize
