Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
he just fucked me for my cheese.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize