wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Randomize
