just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.