ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Just puked most of my soul out..
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
