You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
So then I told him that only a restaurant managed by a florida fan could run out of ketchup
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
