So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
