she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
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The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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