Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
