Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
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