I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
