I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize