I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize