Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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