Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Randomize