The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize