i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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